Shower Power

A couple of months ago we got a new shower, due to the fact our old power shower was slowly dying, It sounded like it was struggling a lot, and it would occasionally reduce its power down to that of a standard shower. This to some of you is fine, but after living with the wonders of a power shower for 5 years it’s a HUGE difference.

Anyway after many weeks of wrestling with the land lady, (who must be out of the matrix the way she kept dodging us and making up excuses) we finally got our new shower.

So I bet your thinking we were all extremely excited, after having to endure our piss poor shower, finally getting back a power shower. Right? Right?
Wrong. Without using it we could tell the plumbers had done a shoddy job, there was a big hole in the tiles, right through the wall

Deciding to forgive them for this, since after all we finally had our shower back.

Getting to the point of this post, I think I’m going to have to quote my Brother here, and state the pressure of the shower is equal to that of “An old man dribbling”. I kid you not; we have gained the world’s worst power shower, in exchange for the world’s best power shower.

Ah, but that’s not the best part, this shower comes with some other nice features.
Such as, that hole I told you about in the tiles… yeah that leaks… causing water to leak through the floor into the room below. (This feature was fixed after a week or two)
It was loud… oh so very loud… (This feature fixed itself after a week or two)
It takes 10 minutes to warm up the water first thing in the morning.

As amazing as these features are… Today it gained another feature when I went for a shower.
Not only was it incredibly loud again, something it’s not done in a month. But interestingly… It has also been affecting the TV signal.
Now… I’m not a plumber, an electrician or someone who specialises in radio waves, or whatever waves, but I can’t even begin to imagine how a shower can affect the TV signal.

Whilst showering I tried to work this out, and it came to me between conditioning my hair and brushing my teeth, all the while listening to the delightful, buzzing the shower was producing. I realised that under the deep buzz of the shower motor there was another constant high pitched noise, the noise which I can only really compare to one thing, which I’m sure most of us have heard before. Remember is music class there were always those metal xylophones (which aren’t real xylophones, since xylophones are wooden, the metal ones have another name which I can’t currently remember), Now imagine playing the highest note on there, the note played out for a pretty long time right? Now imagine playing something a few notes higher… and constant… For the whole shower. Occasionally fluctuating a between a note higher or lower.

Now listening to this note, and thinking the only way the shower could interfere with the TV would be by sending out a signal of its own, I concluded that it was actually sending out a signal to the mother ship, most likely telling it we were foolish human who will never realise their plan until it’s too late.

The worst part of course was as soon as I went to turn the shower off, it went back to normal, the buzzing stopped, the high pitched noise stopped.
My obvious reaction was calling it a bastard, to which it unhooked its shower head and started beating me black and blue until I surrendered.
Ha not really. But I did call it a bastard rather loudly. (Which I’m sure says something about my sanity)